The Filthy Truth about Sex & Love ~ In Fiction

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The Villain's Point of View?

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STORYCRAFT - by Lynne Connolly

-----Original Message-----

"...I like to write in an organic sort of way but I'm thinking I should put more energy into creating a conflict of some sort to drive my tales even though they are short. The problem is, when I think too much, it gets contrived and I hate that.


"I am looking for the way other people think about this issue rather than advice. How do you keep things moving? Do your conflicts and points of tension emerge naturally out of your stories or do you really think hard about what they will be? Can just painting a picture of something beautiful be as worthy of reading as a full blown plot arc?"

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(from Ms. Connolly) - Are you writing purely for your own pleasure, or are you writing to sell your work to a publisher or magazine?

If you're writing for yourself, the only person you have to please is yourself. You don't have to finish anything you get bored with, you don't have to worry about tension and conflict.

Writing to sell, or even to encourage other people to read your work, you have to take other matters into consideration. Your first customer is your publisher, so you have to study what is popular, what is selling, and what is not.

Know What the Publisher will Publish.

Publishing is a business like any other and if you want to sell you have to live by (the individual publisher's) rules. That's just the way it is. It's only courteous not to waste (a publisher's) time by, for instance, by sending an erotic story to a Christian publishing house.

In a recent WIP, (Work in Progress) I wrote a serial killer. I wanted to ratchet up the tension by making him a child killer, but my publisher doesn't allow child killing, so I redrafted and rewrote.

In the field of erotica, you have to take note of taboos. Most mainstream erotica publishers ban; 'real' rape, bestiality, pedophilia and sex involving bodily waste. There are some rules I choose to break, and some publishing houses that will not accept them. But I know what I'm doing.

Fill your Writer's Toolbox...

In order for any publisher to take your work seriously, ie that your manuscript is sellable, you have to take note of certain conventions. Lets not get into what (writing) rules you can break and what you can't. A lot of that depends on the story you want to tell, and your skill. All writers have things they are good at, and things they need to work at.

Learn your strengths and weaknesses.

Read books on plot, characterisation, pov and the rest, attend classes, online or off. It is important that you know the rules before you decide to break them.

For story arcs, try reading Vogler, Campbell and Evan Marshall. All great discussions, and very well illlustrated. Watch "Star Wars" because Lucas admitted he followed Campbell's model very carefully when he made the film. It's a start, and it might give you the 'spark moment' you need.

Suggested Books on Writing

• 'The Writer's Journey' by Christopher Vogler
• 'The Marshall Plan for Novel Writing' by Evan Marshall
• 'The Screenwriter's Workbook' by Syd Field

Tension and Conflict.

Tension and Conflict are vital to a publishable novel, and to many short stories. When you set up your characters, set them goals, and make sure those goals conflict in some way with someone else's. With a romance, it should ideally be the Hero and Heroine who are in conflict. That's why I've moved from romance to romantic suspense. Very often my conflicts come from outside the central relationship. I really don't like my central couple fighting all the time.

Go to: Motivation and Conflict, an article by Patricia Kay

Before I start to write...  

...I've (already) been through a process that takes from a week to a month. I know my characters, (Character sheets) and I have a chapter by chapter outline to work from. (Also known as BLOCKING.) This method might not work for you, but I've tried other methods and this is the one I'm comfortable with. Obviously the pantser method (writing by the seat of your pants) is only working so far for you, so you may need to develop your prewriting technique.

Go To: Assorted PreWriting Exercises by Vickie Kryston

Lynne Connolly
GSOLFOT, Author of urban Gothic romance

Vanity Presses and Self-Publishers are BAD ~ Okay?

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The BIG Secret to Marketing Erotic Romance

The Trut

h is: When it comes to Erotic Romance PR doesn’t do diddly-squat
for sales.

Posting announcement after announcement, after announcement, after announcement,...etc, will NOT get you buyers ~ it gets you BITCHING: "Quit Spamming me!"

Seriously Hot, Well-written, Erotic Romance
Sells Itself.

Put juicy excerpts on your website, post juicy excerpts on readers' email lists and, put excerpts in your release announcements – THAT sells books.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Victoria stepped out of the forward lift and followed Ravnos down the hall. At the command lift her worry deepened. They were definitely headed back to the captain’s quarters. She bit her lip as the lift doors closed behind them. What the hell was he planning now?

Ravnos turned to the keypad and the lift suddenly stopped between decks. He turned back and focused on his executive officer. “Seht, do it now.”

Seht’s head came up in a froth of long white hair. “What? Here?”

Ravnos nodded. “The yeomen have dinner set. I don’t want you shocking them, should you snap.”

Seht flashed long incisors. “I’m not that far gone!”

“And I need your brain back online to make plans,” Ravnos continued smoothly. “We both know you can’t think when you’re in this condition.” He held out his hand. “I’ll hold the coats.”

Seht backed up a step and eyed Victoria. He spat out a vicious oath that Victoria’s internal translator refused to register, and jerked out of his coat. He dug at the buttons of his waistcoat.

Ravnos looked at Victoria. “Take off your coat, and remove your waistcoat.”

Victoria unbuttoned her coat. I really hope this isn’t what it looks like. She shrugged out of it and handed it to her captain. Her fingers fumbled on the buttons of her long waistcoat.

Seht pulled off his cravat, baring his pale throat. He handed everything to the captain, then turned to Victoria. His expression bordered on pain, but his eyes were nearly white-hot with leashed passion. Lust was almost a scent in the air.

Oh, shit -- it is what it looks like. Victoria could not stop her instinctive reaction. She took two quick steps back and pressed against the lift wall.

Seht moved in a blur of speed, his palms flattened against the steel behind her, trapping her against the wall without actually touching her. Heat rolled off his body, and he seemed to tremble. His mouth brushed her ear. “This is not quite what I had planned,” he whispered.

“Then let’s not do this.” Victoria shifted to slide away only to find him pressing full-length against her. His hands slid down the wall to frame her hips.

“Do you want to argue with him?” Seht tilted his head a fraction toward their Captain.

She looked over at Ravnos.

He watched them with cool eyes and a slight smile.

She bit her lip. “No, not really.”

“Neither do I.” Seht’s nod was barely discernable. “Our captain is a little too clever when it comes to retribution.” His hands closed on her skirt, pulling it up her thighs then over her butt.

She sucked in a breath and discovered that lust did indeed have a scent, and it rolled off of Seht, rich, thick, and heady. And exciting.

“Please don’t fight,” he breathed. His lips brushed her throat. “I am closer to the edge than I want him to know. If you fight, I may not be able to control my … appetites.”

From VICTORIOUS STAR
Why do excerpts work so well?

Because Sex - like Food – is a Physical need. Erotica is a snack that feeds the physical need for sex. Excerpts show the readers a taste of what you have to offer and this builds an appetite for more.

All the best marketing ploys for erotica operate under the same philosophy:

“Make them HUNGRY.”

-----Original Message----- "And leave them wondering what happens next. I have seen excerpts that were as erotic as all get out, but told me the entire story, so I had no need to buy the book--especially when the excerpt followed the blurb." - Jackie
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Be CHOOSY about your excerpts.

The LAST thing you want to do is give away the PLOT! If you can't post an excerpt without giving away the plot in your story - then you have one of two Serious Plotting Problems.

- Plot Problem ONE -
ONE sex scene in the entire book.

If your Erotic Romance only has one sex scene, then that story had better be under 20k. If the story over 20k then it's not an Erotic Romance. It's a romance with an Erotic Bit.

Having only ONE sex scene does not mean that the story isn't worth reading or even Erotic, especially if the sexual tension is there throughout. But the bulk of the Erotic Romance buyers are looking for Sex first.

There ARE top-selling authors whose stories Do Not rely on Sex.

Mary Janice Davidson writes spectacular romantic paranormal comedies and Brenna Lyons weaves epic adventures, for example, but they are VERY GOOD, and these authors are Very Established. If a newcomer wants to compete with them, they had better be good enough to tempt the readers who are shopping for sex-books if they intend to sell a Second book.

There ARE readers who prefer Story to Sex.

But they do not represent the largest ratio of BUYERS. If you want to make decent sales numbers, catering to the smallest denominator of buyers is NOT the way to do it. If you want to make Big Sales you have to catch the attention of the largest ratio of buyers - and they want hot, juicy, and Detailed SEX. It's ugly, but it's the TRUTH.

Sexual Tension is NOT enough. 

A book over 20k with only one sex scene (no matter how much sexual tension is in the rest of it) is NOT what the largest ratio of buyers in this market are Shopping for. The biggest ratio of Erotic Romance buyers are Shopping SPECIFICALLY for Sexual Adventure Stories. A story over 20k should have at least 2 sex scenes.

Adding Sex to an existing story is a BAD IDEA. 

You should never put anything into a story that does not belong there -- ESPECIALLY SEX! Even I don't write that way. Every sex scene in each of my books has a reason to be there.

Don't know where to put the sex?
Go To: "Steam 101" by Angela Knight

- Plot Problem TWO -
Boy Gets Girl - IS the plot.

If boy and girl getting together IS the plot, then that story had better be under 20k. If it's over 20k then you've got a problem. If it's over 40k you have a Serious problem - NO PLOT.

If all you have is two people falling in love and nothing else, your story lacks MEAT. Sex alone does not sell to this market; they want a Good Story too!

In this jaded market, boy and girl STAYING Together --not Getting together-- should be the plot IN ADDITION to the story's actual plot-line. Technically, the Romance should be a Sub-Plot with the rest of the story trying to keep them apart.

This is a Choosy market and there are too many really talented authors that know how to weave a STORY with their Erotica and Romance. If you expect to compete for those buyers, you had better have a Meaty Plot - in addition to Love.

EXCERPTS Sell books.

Trust me; I know what I’m talking about.
You wanna do Press Releases anyway?
Then do it right.
Go To: Getting Good Press by Robert J. Sawyer

Morgan Hawke
www.darkerotica.net
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Keeping Count ~ Tricks for Controlling Word Count

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PHANTOM of the OPERA ~ Great Movie! BAD PLOT!

The Phantom's Hidden Plotline

I LOVED the Phantom of the Opera movie! Gerard Butler kicked fucking ass! He was a joy to watch and a total pleasure to listen to. I already have this soundtrack. The Phantom should sing like a Manly Man – not like some one with their balls in a vice. (I will NEVER listen to that whiny tenor’s music again.)

The movie was FANTASTIC! I shall endeavor to watch it as many times as I can scrape up the cash to do so.

But the Plot-line for the 'Phantom of the Opera' - the actual STORY -- IS WRONG!!!

Somebody Fucked Up
the Author’s Original Plot!

My 'theory' is that 'The Phantom of the Opera' that we have come to know, from the original magazine published edition, (it was published as a book a year later,) is Not the story Leroux actually intended.

My guess is that the very first publisher made the Leroux Change the Story - so as not to offend anyone during the time when 'The Phantom of the Opera' was first published in France, in 1910.

Why would a Publisher CHANGE a Manuscript?
This Changing of Manuscripts is a COMMON occurrence. Publishers REGULARLY change whole stories – ripping them apart to suit what they think their reading audience will buy. It still happens. Ask any published author.

The 'Phantom of the Opera' was first released, as installments in a magazine, only four years before the start of WWI when tempers were running very hot. Whether or not Leroux's publisher paid his bills depended on the public liking the story enough to BUY his magazines. Additionally, he could not afford to piss off anyone with any real power to shut his publishing house down -- such as the MILITARY.
Before I go any further...
Let me make this crystal clear -- I am not a critic, and this is Not a Critique of the movie, the play, the published book that the movie and the play comes from, or what Leroux's publisher released in those long ago magazine installments. I am referring to what I 'suspect' was in the original manuscript that Leroux submitted to the publisher.

I am a FICTION AUTHOR following clues in a PLOTLINE using the latest movie/play as a model because THAT is the story most people are familiar with -- those are examples that can be followed.
To any fiction author, it’s as plain and livid as an open wound; this Story was Changed before it ever saw print.
 

What gave me this idea?
Traces of the CORRECT PLOT are still there
-- even in the current movie.

 

Let us begin by unraveling:
The CHARACTERS

The basic audience assumption:
Christine and Raoul were young and stupid.
They deserved each other.

Christine may have been young and stupid
– but Raoul definitely WASN’T.

Raoul was neither stupid – nor Young. Raoul was a lord, and lords were highly educated. Raoul was also stated as being a Captain fresh from the field. The amount of field experience it takes to reach captain is measured in gruelling battle-hardened Years. You did not survive to BE a field Captain without brains - and ruthlessness.

The character of Raoul could not have been younger than his early to mid 30s.

According to the story’s clues, the PHANTOM is actually Younger than Raoul! 

Poor Sweet Not-So-Innocent Christine…

The story begins with Christine as an Opera DANCER who later becomes an Opera Diva.

There was a REASON Raoul was pursuing Christine - and it wasn't LOVE. During this time period Lords like Raoul, pursued Opera Dancers for their mistresses.

Lords keeping Opera Dancers as mistresses, was not only common - it was EXPECTED, (even in 1910.) This is how the Opera Dancers made a living. An Opera Dancer was kept in her own little apartment - paid for by the lord, and rewarded with jewels and cash. The lords were called Patrons.

Opera Dancers BECAME Opera Dancers to Make Money - not from the Opera, but by being good enough to catch a Lord that would pay for everything: housing, clothes, jewels... Opera Dancers were members of the Demimonde - ladies of the Evening.

In this day and age, Opera Dancers are referred to as Exotic Dancers -- strippers.

The Diva Issue

Divas were professionally trained Artistes and often titled though impoverished, nobility. Christine was NEVER presented as being nobility. She was the daughter of a Musician - a violinist.

The Diva had damned good reason to be pissed with Christine. An Opera Dancer - a common-born untrained stripper - taking her place?

 

The Phantom - NOT your Common Psycho.

PHANTOM was not your ordinary weird guy hiding in the sewers. No ifs, ands, or, buts, about it. There was absolutely, positively Nothing common-born about the Phantom. EVERYTHING about him screamed: NOBILITY! His character, his dress, his ability to WRITE - never mind compose music and design an entire opera house!

PHANTOM was clearly a lost - or hiding - nobleman.

As a lost noble, Phantom would have had a STAFF to maintain him and that fancy cave. Lords of the 1800's couldn't do diddly-squat for themselves, so someone had to cook for him, clean his place, shop for food, sew, and tailor that neat-o keen wardrobe of his...etc. There are traces of a fanatically loyal staff in the original book, but they are gone by the time you get to the big productions. 

The REAL VILLAIN of the Piece – Raoul

Raoul was Not Young - and definitely Not Stupid. Nor was he in love. Raoul's pursuit of Christine began with her first leading performance and was very deliberate.

THINK: A 30-year-old handsome and experienced Lord chasing after a 17-year-old celebrity? Where's the Stupidity?

The Villainy was right there in front of everybody:
 -- Lords DID NOT MARRY Demimondes. EVER. 

Lords had their Family honor to protect - they did not marry whores. (How would you feel if your son announced that he was marrying an acclaimed Stripper -- or a Porn Star?)

The fact that Christine thought she might have a chance marrying Raoul, just shows how Stupid her character had become. The Diva, who was likely an impoverished noblewoman, had a better chance of marrying Raoul than Christine did.

Phantom was free to chase after Christine, because while he was noble, he was also dead to his family. It didn't matter who he married - his family's honor was being protected by someone else.

The Warped Plot

There's a rift in the plot about halfway through, when Christine visits her father's grave. THIS is when discrepancies begin to appear, and the plot goes awry.

It is at this point that the story no longer plays to the characters as they are actually presented: Raoul becomes heroic, Phantom becomes a murdering psycho and Christine becomes TSTL (too stupid to live.)

However, there are Still traces of the correct plot within the unfolding events themselves.

1) Christine visits her father's grave

This visit should have underlined the fact that Christine was a commoner, and Demimonde (a prostitute), verses what Raoul was -- Nobility. This should have snapped her out of her dream world and made her see Raoul for what he was -- a man pursuing an exciting and decorative mistress, and the Phantom as what he was -- someone who actually cared.

Phantom had watched over her and guarded her since childhood. He had seen that she had something of a noble's education and had even taught her some of the noble arts - MUSIC.

Of COURSE he loved her.

How did Phantom end up being Christine's guardian? All kinds of ways. Christine's father and the Phantom were both musicians; they may have been compositional associates. It was more likely that Christine's dad was part of the Phantom's personal staff. Nobles of that day cared for their staff as Family, so of course he would watch over his staff's child as well.

After realizing the truth of what Raoul was asking of her - sex - Christine would have come to the realization that it was the Phantom that actually loved her. Phantom had had a number of opportunites to seduce her - and had never used any of them.

2) Raoul's Purpose in the Graveyard

Raoul had been openly and blatantly STALKING Christine since her first performance. When Raoul showed up in the graveyard, it was quite obvious that he had followed Christine expecting to find her alone, and unprotected.

There was no question in anyone's mind what Raoul wanted. The duel happened because the Phantom was defending Christine against a rapist.

Once Raoul incapacitated Christine's only defender, Raoul would have taken immediate advantage of Christine's brand-new guilt towards the Phantom (he truly loved her - and now he was going to die for her) to pressure Christine into submitting and becoming his mistress. 

"I'll kill him right here, right now, if you don't come with me!"

This is also when the Phantom would have been unmasked for the first time -- by Raoul. Raoul would have been trying to force the point home: that Raoul was better because he was Prettier.

Prettier???

Physical Appearance was a HUGE issue back in the 1800's when this story was written. Ugliness was considered God's Punishment. If you were ugly, you MUST be Evil.

3) The Phantom’s Sword Wound

Raoul was a skilled and practiced swordsman. There is no way in Hell that the bookish and reclusive Phantom had enough sword-training to successfully duel with a battle-hardened captain.

At the same time, Raoul would have known better than to kill Christine's beloved guardian right before her eyes, but he was not about to let Christine's one defender live. By the time the duel stopped, Raoul would have made very sure that he had already delivered a mortal wound.

Note: A small sword cut in the armpits or in the juncture of the legs will pierce a major artery, causing massive amounts of blood-loss and DEATH in a very short period of time.

When Raoul forced Christine to submit to him - at the price of her guardian's life - Raoul was convinced that the Phantom was already dying.

4) That chandelier would still have fallen.

Phantom wasn’t a murdering psycho – he was PISSED OFF!

Recovering from the near-fatal duel is a more logical reason why the Phantom disappeared for so long from the opera. (He was gone for several months. It’s still there even in the plays!) He was obviously recovering from his wounds.

Once he regained his strength, Phantom would have been furious with Raoul - and in a panic to save Christine. Only now, he knew that there was no way he could take Raoul in a fair fight - because Raoul did not fight fair. The only way to beat Raoul was to get him with a sneak-attack.

Unfortunately Raoul was too much of a battle-seasoned survivor to catch that easily.

5) Raoul – the Real Psycho

Once Raoul got out of the way of the falling lighting fixture, the Captain would have gone out of his way to hunt down the young and idealistic Phantom to make he sure was well and truly dead. 

 

Why? Because as long as the Phantom lived, Christine could escape him at any time. 

 

Being a man's mistress had One Advantage over being his wife.  

A wife was legally owned by her husband, he could have her arrested and brought back. A mistress was legally outside his reach.

As long as Phantom lived - Christine could leave him.

What probably confused Raoul the most, was that Christine actually Would leave him -- and he knew it.

6) In the final Battle between Raoul and Phantom
-- Who Captured Who? REALLY?

Raoul was the better fighter, and the Phantom was STILL recovering from his last fight with Raoul. Logic points to the fact that the Phantom would have been captured, and threatened with death, rather than the other way around, as the current plot has it.

Raoul would have been the one to force Christine into choosing between them -- with the intent to kill her if she chose the Phantom over him.

7) Christine’s Actual Love Dilemma

The REAL pressure on Christine should have been:

• Go with the man she'd been sleeping with for the past few months and accept her role as whore.

 - or - 

• Die with the one man who proved time and again, that he loved her.

The original Author's obvious Ending? 

•  Christine left with Raoul to save the Phantom; breaking everyone’s heart, including her own. True Love as Sacrifice.

What the hell Happened
- to the REAL Love Story???

In 1910, with WWI looming, when this book was first penned, it was UNTHINKABLE that a handsome military man, and a lord would be represented as anything other than heroic while a man who was disfigured (cursed by God) could possibly be anything other than villainous.

The story HAD to be changed, for the sake of public proprieties. (Keep in mind, DRACULA, published in 1897 --only 13 years earlier-- caused a major uproar among the British nobility because the Vampire was a Noble.)

So Raoul got white-washed into a hero, Phantom got black-washed into a common basement-dwelling psycho, and Christine became TSTL (too stupid to live) when in fact she was a woman who sacrificed her honor and her life to save the man she loved.

CONCLUSION -
What am I trying to Prove?

The purpose in this article is to show that sometimes a deeper --and better-- story is present within a published work. As writers, it is our job to ferret out these hidden stories and bring them to light.

What am I trying to Say?

There are enough clues in 'The Phantom of the Opera' to construct an entirely different story. Anyone who writes fiction professionally can see exactly what I saw. The current story as presented is WRONG.

What was obviously a “love story” about sacrifice had been changed into a “descent into madness” story, with only a few cosmetic adjustments made to accommodate for those changes.

Somebody PLEASE do this story RIGHT, damn It!!! 

Because if "I" have to do it, I will write 'The Phantom of the Opera' as the true EROTIC HORROR it obviously should have been.
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Documentation:
http://www.phantomoftheopera.info/history2.htm

Morgan Hawke
www.darkerotica.net
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