Strong Characters but a Weak Plot?

 Secret Place by Dawn Elaine Darkwood

----- Original Message -----
...I have very strong characters, but a very weak plot. While my story is primarily character driven, I feel I feel I put them in a place where there's not much plot, or that the plot itself is uninteresting. How do make my plot stronger? Furthermore, how do I find a balance between plot and characters? Or is it okay that my plot isn't gripping, as long as I have strong, well-developed characters?

 -- Wanna Write it Right!

 

What should you do when you have
Strong Characters but a Weak Plot?

 

First, I think we should clarify what Character-Driven means. 

 

Character-Driven does NOT mean:

A story that focuses on the characters.

Character-Driven means: 

A story's events happen because the Characters choose (or refuse) to make things happen. In other words; the story's Plot is Driven by the events caused by the characters.

Examples of Character-Driven stories: 

Stories where the characters make events happen, such as: Iron Man, Batman, How to Train your Dragon, and most Romance stories such as; Miss Congeniality, Secretary, Pride & Prejudice.

In comparison:

Plot-Driven means: 

A story's events happen to the characters, and the characters struggle to deal with them.

Examples of Plot-Driven stories: 

Stories where a chracter is pushed into being a hero whether they want to or not, such as; Spiderman, Pitch Black, and Dr. Strange. Also, most broad-range fantasy stories such as; the Harry Potter series, The Sandman graphic novel series, The Wheel of Time, The Sword of Shannara, Lord of the Rings books and movies, and most Science-Fiction such as Brave New World, Equilibrium, The Matrix, Soylant Green, Star Trek, Babylon 5, Battlestar Galactica.

To simplify:

• If the Characters make Events happen to each other and/or the World around them it's Character-Driven.
• If the Events make things happen to the Characters and/or the World around them it's Plot-Driven. 

Now that we have that straight, on with your questions! 

Let's start with this: 

 

"Is it okay that my plot isn't gripping, as long as I have strong, well-developed characters?"

NO. It's Not Okay.

No matter how interesting your characters are, if they're in a boring story your characters will seem boring too. To show off interesting characters, they have to DO interesting things. A cool back-story is Not Enough.

Example: 

Batman, Robin, Superman, and Deadpool were fishing on the bank of a river. As a result of the smart-assed comments passed around between them, an argument broke out over whose superpower was best. To decide, each one one caught a fish using their superpowers. Still unable to decide, they went home.

Boring.

Why? Even though we had four interesting and engaging superheroes, they didn't really do anything but fish. Sure, the dialogue between them was probably pretty awesome, but honestly? You could have told the same story with 4 old men, 4 little kids, or 4 grannies. 

 

In fact it actually would have been a better story if the 4 old men, 4 little kids, or 4 grannies had used superpowers to fish.

Those four superheroes were WASTED on this story.

To put it bluntly:

If you're going to use super characters,

you need a super Story to show them off.

Next question...

"How do make my plot stronger? Furthermore, how do I find a balance between plot and characters?"

To Make a PLOT Stronger:
Add More Problems 

for the Characters to Solve.
AKA: Add More CONFLICTS.

 

What's the Worst Thing that could happen? 

Make that happen! 

AKA: Murphy's Law. 

Where do you get this Worse Thing that could happen?

 

From your Characters.

Begin here...

Who are your

3 Main Characters?

• The Main Character whose adventures the story tends to focus on.
  
• The Villain or Trouble-maker character.
• The Ally character that supports one or both. 

This doesn't mean you can't have a huge cast of characters! Simply that these are the 3 that the main story focuses on.

 

 Examples from Anime:

In Hellsing (Plot-Driven) the 3 characters are thus:

• Main Character: Sir Integra Hellsing
• Ally: Seres Victoria
• Villain or Trouble-maker character: Alucard

Until an actual Villain is added, then the cast changes to:

• Main Character: Alucard
  
• Ally: Either Sir Integra OR Seres Victoria; depending on the scene they're in. 
• Villain or Trouble-maker: Guest Villain 

In Full Metal Alchemist (sometimes Plot-driven, sometimes Character-driven depending on the episode,) the 3 characters are thus:

• Main Character: Edward Elric
• Ally: Alphonse Elric
• Villain or Trouble-maker: Colonel Mustang

Until an actual Villain is added, then the cast changes to:

• Main Character: Edward Elric
• Ally: Alphonse Elric, Colonel Mustang, or guest Victim
• Villain or Trouble-maker: Guest Villain

Keep in mind that Hellsing and Full Metal Alchemist are both Series stories so new characters are constantly being introduced as Victims (Ally characters) and as Villains to expand the story.

The idea behind this technique is:

The better you know your Characters' Problems,
the easier it is to make MORE Problems for them to solve. 

 

The Hawk and the Dove 

A very popular bodice-ripper. 

In a Romance story, 

the roles change drastically. 

In a Traditional Romance, the 3 Main Characters look like thus:

• Main Character: Heroine
• Villain or Trouble-maker: Hero
• Ally: his best friend and/or her closest relative, (brother, mother, great aunt, grandfather...)

These Romances are traditionally told from the Female point of view and the Heroine does Not initiate the romance --or hardly anything else-- the Male character does. 

 

This is because these stories were invented (and codified) during the 1700's and 1800's where a female that was 'forward' about her affections was considered to be 'impolite', 'pushy' and low-class. Since most of these stories featured high-society females; lost princesses, impoverished Ladies, and down-trodden heiresses, being 'pushy' was not something they would do. Only female Villains acted that way.

Keep in mind that the original romances were written by 18th and 19th century middle-class authors Fantasizing about how they thought high-class noble ladies would act. It proved so popular an 'ideal' that this fantasy of nobility persists today.

But, if the Heroine never initiated the first move,
How did Romance happen?

It started with some sort of Event where the two crossed paths, and the Hero decided that he wanted the Heroine, usually because she was pretty. (Think: Cinderella.) 

 

The following 3/4s of the story consists of the many ways the Hero seduces the Heroine in increasingly racy scenes, while the Heroine seeks to 'escape his clutches.' 

 

Eventually, the Hero rescues the Heroine from some sort of mortal peril, and confesses his love. 

 

She confesses that she loves him too. 

 

The very next scene is where the Hero fixes the story's main conflict -- usually the Heroine's conflict.

 

Cue: Wedding and Happily Ever After.

Traditional Romance 

in detail:

1) They cross paths during an Event.
-- Could be at a party, could be on a battlefield, could be on a ship at sea, he could be in the coach she's trying to rob at pistol-point...

• She's there because she has a Problem she's trying to fix.
  
• He's there as an invited guest.
  

2) He  decides he wants her, and interferes in whatever she was trying to accomplish. 

• Ruining whatever plan she had going on.
  

3) She wants nothing to do with him. 

• She's too busy trying to deal with her Problem.

4) He either actively pursues her to seduce her, or keeps running into her while minding his own business, and simply can't resist making a grab for her.  

• The first time he catches her, he gives her a less-than-consensual kiss. 

5) She escapes. 

• In common Romances, she escapes before he can get into her panties.
• In bodice-rippers and Erotic Romances, she does not. 
  

Repeat 4) and 5) for the next 80k words, or 30 chapters.  

• Insert increasingly racy Seduction scenes.
• Insert decreasing amounts of resistance to letting him have his way with her.
  

If there's an actual plot going on during this, that plot gets increasingly dangerous for the Heroine. The Hero is much too powerful for anything to really affect him. 

6) She falls into mortal peril. 

• While attempting to fix her own problem.

7) He rescues her and confesses his love. 

• May happen up to 3 times, saving the Confession for the last Rescue. 

8) She confesses that she's in love too, and tells him about the Problem she is trying to fix.  

• Insert: Consensual Love Scene.

9) He voluntarily fixes her problem for her, and proposes marriage.

10) Big Wedding scene and Happily Ever After.

Unfortunately, I am not exaggerating, the plots really were this simple, and that sexist. The Heroine did not fix her own problems, the Hero did all the heavy-lifting. (Apparently, that's what husbands were for.)

Art by Luis Royo

Modern Romances 

A tad bit different. 

Modern Romances have the Heroine rescue the Hero (or they rescue each other) from some sort of mortal peril at the center of the story, and during this, she discovers that she loves him. 

 

Even so, she still runs from his 'clutches' for quite a bit until he admits that he loves her. 

 

Deciding to fight together, they solve the story's major conflicts. 

 

Cue: Happily Ever After.

Modern Romance 

in detail:

1) They cross paths during an Event.
-- Could be at a party, could be on a battlefield, could be on a ship at sea, he could be in the coach she's trying to rob at pistol-point...

• She's there because she has a Problem she's trying to fix.
  
• He's there because he has his own problem to fix. 

2) Plans go awry.

• Sometimes she interferes in whatever he was trying to accomplish. 
• Sometime he interferes with her plans. 

2b) They end up in a Compromising Position and become mutually attracted.

• Insert less-than-consensual kiss.
  

3) She admits to herself that he's damned good looking, and very good at kissing, but wants nothing to do with him. 

• She's too busy trying to deal with her Problem.

4) He either actively pursues her to seduce her, or keeps running into her while minding his own business, and simply can't resist making a grab for her.  

• Insert racy less-than-consensual Seduction Scene.

5) As soon as he falls asleep, she escapes.

Repeat 4) and 5) for the next 80k words, or 30 chapters.  

• Insert: increasingly racy less-than-consensual Seduction Scenes.
• Insert decreasing amounts of resistance to letting him have his way with her.

Modern Romances do tend to have actual plot going on, so things get increasingly dangerous for both the Heroine and the Hero. 

6) They both fall into mortal peril while attempting to fix their own problems.

• Sometimes they fall into peril together, sometimes separately.

7) She rescues Him, or they rescue Each Other.

• Insert: Major Love Scene.
• May happen up to 3 times -- including the love scene. 
  

8) She decides that she's in love, or that she's been in love since their first encounter, but still runs from him. 

9) At next encounter, he admits that he's in Love. 

•  Cue: Double Confession 

10) They find a way to fix their problems Together. 

11) Happily Ever After or Happily For Now.

 

Yaoi M/M Romances 

 

First of all, do not confuse Yaoi with mainstream M/M Gay fiction. They are Not The Same -- at all. 

Mainstream M/M Gay fiction is far more realistic in how male-male relationships are portrayed -- with very little romance, and a lot of hardcore hook-ups where names are not even mentioned. They also tend to feature domestic violence, domestic rape, drug abuse, alcoholism, and frequently suicide. 

 

The theme of these stories is more often than not: Unrequited Love that will never be reciprocated. In these stories, Happy ending are few and far between.

 

Yaoi stories are M/M Fantasy Romances 

written by women for female romance readers.

 

Don't get me wrong! I have tons of gay male friends who adore these stories, but they also make a point to say that they are nothing like the reality of a gay relationship -- which is why they like them. 

 

Now, on to the good stuff! 

 

Yaoi Romances tend to have a bit a lot in common with Bodice-Ripper Romances.

 

Both the character tropes and the plot lines in Yaoi stories and Bodice-Rippers are damned near identical.

• The Main Character is usually if not always, lovely in appearance, kind in nature, and in some kind of trouble -- the Heroine's trope. 
• Their Pursuer is handsome, aggressive, rich, and occupies a powerful position -- the Villain's trope.

There can be other villains, or even a Hero or two, but they are all defeated by the MC's powerful Pursuer. 

 

As for the plot-- 

 

Yaoi Romances generally start with some sort of Event where the two cross paths, and both are immediately attracted to each other. One decides that they will do anything to have the other. 

 

The next part of the of the story consists of the many ways the Pursued seeks to 'escape his Pursuer's clutches'. 

 

At the center of the story, The Pursuer rescues the Pursued from some sort of peril and takes that chance to reinstate his attraction, usually forcefully. 

 

During this time the Pursued admits to themselves that it might be more than mere attraction. It might be love. (Oh Noes!) 

 

Cue more running from 'clutches' until their Pursuer admits that they're in Love. 

 

Insert Double Confession. 

 

Deciding to fight side by side, they solve the story's major conflicts.

 

Cue: Tropical Vacation scene and Happily Ever After.

Yaoi Romance 

in detail:

1) They cross paths.
-- Could be at a party, could be on a battlefield, could be on a ship at sea, one could be in the coach the other trying to rob at pistol-point...

• Each is attempting to deal with their own Problem. 
• Or One is trying to fix their problem, while the other is an invited guest.
  

2) One decides he wants the other, and promptly demonstrates this. 

• By pulling them into a dark corner and stealing a Kiss. 
• This sometimes develops into a full-blown hardcore seduction scene against the wall.
• Ruining whatever plans the other has going on. 

3) The Pursued he admits to himself that his Pursuer is damned good looking, and very good at kissing, but wants nothing to do with his Pursuer. 

• The Pursued is too busy trying to deal with his Problem. 

4) The Pursuer literally stalks his interest until he corners and/or traps his Prey in a situation his Prey can't get himself out of. 

• This, more frequently than not, involves some form of Bondage. 
• Insert less-than-consensual Seduction scene. 
  
• In many cases, the Pursuer offers to assist his trapped Prey with their personal problem in trade for sexual favors.
• The Prey usually disagrees, they want to fix their own problem. 
•  Insert less-than-consensual Seduction scene.
• If they agree, they are treated like a Housewife, or a human Pet. 
• The Prey may also suffer days, weeks, or months of erotic captivity.
  

5) The Pursued escapes. 

 

Repeat 4) and 5) for the next 3/4s of the story, manga, anime, fan-fic... 

• Insert: increasingly graphic less-than-consensual Seduction Scenes.
• Insert: decreasing amounts of resistance to letting his Pursuer have his way.

If there's an actual plot going on during this, that plot gets increasingly dangerous for both the Pursued and the Pursuer.

 

6) They both fall into mortal peril while attempting to fix their own problems.

• Sometimes they fall into peril together. 
• Insert Captivity seduction scene. 
• Followed by daring escape together.
  
• More often they fall into peril separately. 
• The Pursuer escapes. 
• The Pursued fails his escape.
  
• If the Pursuer falls into peril, and their Pursued has not -- 
  
• The Pursued will try to rescue their Pursuer. 
• The Pursued often succeeds in the rescue, but is captured. 
  

7) The Pursuer rushes off to rescue his Prey. 

 

7b) Sometimes the Pursuer doesn't get there in time -- because the Pursuer was grievously, but not mortally, wounded.​

• When this happens, the Pursued is seduced by the Pursuer's blindingly handsome, and filthy rich enemy.
  • Insert several captivity seduction scenes between Prey and handsome Enemy.
  • Insert decreasing amounts of resistance to letting him have his way.

7c) Eventually, the Pursuer succeeds in stealing his Prey back from the clutches of his enemy.

• Insert: Consensual Love Scene. 
• May happen up to 3 time with 3 different handsome Enemies. 

 

8) The Pursued decides that they're in love, or that they've been in love since the first encounter, but still runs from their Pursuer. 

• They don't want to look weak by admitting that they have feelings.

9) At next encounter, the Pursuer:

• Admits that he's in Love.
  • Cue: Double Confession
  • The Pursuer may then propose marriage.
• Seduces their Prey into admitting their feelings.
  • Then confesses his own and may propose marriage.

10) Deciding to fight side by side, they solve the story's major conflicts.

11) Final scene is a Tropical Vacation scene implying: Happily Ever After.

• or a Big Wedding

A Quick and Dirty way to Build a Plot
from your Characters!

 
Once you decide who your 3 Main Characters are:

• Main character:
• Ally: 
• Villain or Trouble-maker:

Ask EACH character these 3 questions:

1. Who am I, and what do I do?
2. What do I want?
3. What is the Worst thing that could happen to me?

Once you know the answers to these three questions, you pretty much have your whole story.

By combining the 1's you have the Opening scene to your story. 

By combining the 2's you have your External Conflicts scenes (what the character DO and what happens TO the characters,) and your Internal Conflict scenes (how they Feel about what's happening.) 

By combining the 3's you have your Main Character's Ordeal/Self-Sacrifice scene; the one thing they don't want to do, but have to (often to survive,) and your potential Climax scene. 

 

Do not be afraid to change things around or adjust things to suit the story you want to tell. 

Do Not Forget....!

A story cannot END until 

ALL the Main characters' problems have been Solved!

Morgan Hawke

Fifty Shades of ABUSE

Fifty Abusive Moments in
Fifty Shades of Grey

 http://theramblingcurl.blogspot.com/2014/02/fifty-abusive-moments-in-fifty-shades.html

Yes, you read that title right.  I'm so tired of being told that there's no abuse in Fifty Shades of Grey, that I've decided to compile something of a list.  A list of fifty abusive moments, to be precise.  Because, well, I'm a sucker for a blog title that's also a play on the book title.  I'm aware that this is going to be a LONG process and therefore a long, long blog to read, but if you've somehow stumbled upon it as a Fifty Shades fan, I implore you to at the very least give it a look. Think there can't possibly be fifty examples of abuse in the biggest-selling "romance" novel of all time?  Think again...

This is supposed to be a "love story" and I don't know how many ways of saying "it's not" there are left.  All I'm going to say is NO.  If someone treats you the way Christian treats Ana, get the hell out of there.  You deserve better.  We all do.  And we all deserve better "erotica" than Fifty Shades of Grey.

To read the entire thing, in all it's wondrous glory: 

Go HERE. Read that. 

Posted on: The Rambling Curl

And just for the record, I AGREE.

So you want a Critique? [RANT]

So you want a Critique?

WARNING! Incoming Rant!

A Critique...? Really? Are you sure that's what you want? 

From the responses I've gotten on many different forums, and the responses I've seen others get, plus the resulting peanut gallery commentary, I'm not so sure a Critique is what some of you are actually looking for.

Let's start at the beginning.

Do you even know what a Critique actually is?

cri·tique
kriˈtēk/
noun: critique; plural noun: critiques
1. a detailed analysis and assessment of something, especially a literary, philosophical, or political theory. 

synonyms: analysis, evaluation, assessment, appraisal, appreciation, criticism, review, study, commentary, exposition, exegesis 

"a critique of North American culture"

verb: critique; 3rd person present: critiques; past tense: critiqued; past participle: critiqued; gerund or present participle: critiquing 

1. evaluate (a theory or practice) in a detailed and analytical way. 

"the authors critique the methods and practices used in the research"

THINK: Are you actually looking for a Critique; a detailed analysis of your work, or are you really looking for something else, but that's the word everyone else is using so you're using it too? 

Things you might really be looking for:

• "Can you check my sentence structure and look for typos?"
• "Are my characters interesting enough to keep reading?"
• "Is this fight scene or love scene confusing? Did I describe it well enough that you can see what's going on clearly in your imagination?"
• "Does this story drag? Is it boring to you?"
• "Have I used too much narrative and exposition? What should I trim out?"
• "Should I use additional characters to tell this story, or stick with what I have?"
• "Should I use more description in this scene, or more dialog?"
• "Do you like this Main Character, or should I use someone different?"
• "Should I keep writing this or scrap the whole thing?"
• "Is my dialog entertaining enough to keep you interested?"
• "Did I do good this time? Is this an improvement on my last work?"

Once you know what you're really looking for,

you then need to know:
How to ASK

for what you actually Want.

Here are some examples of how you DON'T do it.

• "Will you gimme a critique?"
• "Can you take a look at my story?"
• "Can you give me an honest opinion of my story?"
• "Can you tell me if this is any good?"

None of these questions will get you what you're after so Stop Asking Them.

Instead:

Be Direct!

Ask point-blank for what you actually Want.

 

Don't play around. Ask for what you want in clear, simple English. Being indirect or too broad in your request for help with your work will not only Not get you want you really want, it frustrates the hell out of those of us that want to help you. How are we supposed to assist you when we don't know what kind of assistance you're looking for?

• You want a Character Interaction check? ASK for one.
• You want a Plotting check? ASK for one.
• You want a Grammar and Typo check? ASK for one.
• You want an Action Scene Description check? ASK for one.
• You want to know if a Scene is boring? ASK if it's boring.
• You want to know if you have enough info in your info-dump exposition, or if you have too much? Ask exactly that.
• You want all of the above? List the entire set of questions and ASK for those things to be checked.

And just for the record:

Specify if this is a Creative Writing piece 

or something you intend for  

Professional Publication.

 

The advice from the Professionals such as myself ("Follow these rules,") tends to be diametrically opposed to the Creative writers ("There are no rules!") If you want to avoid a fight breaking out between them, specify the type of writing advice you're looking for. Seriously.

So...!

Don't just throw your writing at us and ask for a Critique!
ASK for Precisely what you Want.

This way, those of us experienced enough to offer you solid advice can give you the solid advice you want.

And for God's sake...

Don't Attack those of us that answer you!

 

No one wants to help someone that bites the hand that gives them what they asked for. 

 

If you're not mature enough to gracefully accept that you're going to hear things you may not like about your work, then you're not mature enough to ask for assistance from those of us that actually know what the hell we're doing.

There are tons of people that are damned good at writing, but won't say a word because they've been bitten one too many times when all they did was try to help, myself included.

Suggestion for the Shy

that want to offer their help:

 

Private Message (PM) the person you want to help and ASK if they're interested in hearing what you want to say. 

 

If they say "Sure!" PM your analysis of their work. 

 

If your analysis is particularly long and detailed, in other words; it's going to take a lot of rewriting to get their work straight, don't expect a reply for at least a week. It takes about that long for the impact to wear off. 

Remember, it always hurts when someone points out something you got wrong.

Also, don't expect them to follow your advice immediately. Nine times out of ten they will wait to see if anyone else says the same thing -- or offers an easier solution. 

 

If your analysis is supported by others the next stage is to try out your advice and see if it actually works for them. Sometimes it will, sometimes it won't. All you can do is offer. It's up to them to decide if they want to take your advice or not, so don't freak out if they say, "Thanks, but I wanna try something else."

One more thing...

Members of the Peanut Gallery?
Stay the hell OUT! 

Don't get in the way of someone trying to help someone else. 

 

If you don't like the advice offered, it's fine to offer your own take on the situation -- that's actually Helpful. 

 

Don't attack the other people offering advice.

 

That's not just Rude, it's extremely Unhelpful to the person who posted for help.So what if it doesn't agree with what you believe to be true? It's up to the person who Asked for said advice to decide if they want to take the advice offered, or not -- Not You, so Butt-Out!

I have spoken.

[/rant]

You may commence with the bitching. ♥

Writing Realistic Emotions -- The Dark Side

Once upon a time, I had a great deal of trouble writing Emotions. Luckily, I found a writer friend who was very skilled in doing just that. After months of begging, she wrote me this tutorial on how to evoke the Darker Emotions in Fiction. 

Writing Realistic Emotions in Fiction

The Dark Side

by Kita the Spaz

Posted With Permission

When writing fiction (or for that matter, non-fiction) emotions carry the story. But if they come across as too flat or two-dimensional to the reader, the tale you are trying to tell loses something in the translation. 

How many of you have read something that just flat-out tells how things go, without keeping your interest or the characters holding your sympathy, pity, or in some cases, loathing? 

When a story reads like that, you’re just as likely to put the book down, or navigate away from the page, and not pick it up again.

When expressing an emotion, it is necessary to take into account the whole package. 

Don’t just say: 

Jason was furious, even while she apologized.

That tells the reader almost nothing about what Jason is feeling right now. Strong emotions have physical presence too. If you are angry, your heartbeat speeds and there are other purely physical reactions. 

Better to say: 

Jason was furious. His skin prickled with the heat of his anger and his hands clenched into fists so tight his joints ached. His heartbeat throbbed in his ears with a dull roar that muted her apologetic words.

You see? With that description, the reader feels what Jason is going through. It makes for a more exciting read that way, and offers an in into the reactions and feelings of the character. As a writer, you have to take into account the physical presence of emotions.

I’m going to take you on a quick tour of several emotions, and the physical reactions that go with them. How they feel, how your body reacts, hell, even how they taste, sometimes.

We’ll start with the one used in our example.

Anger

The Encarta Dictionary gives the definition of anger as:

An*ger (noun) (1) Displeasure. A strong feeling of grievance and displeasure. (2) (verb) To become or make greatly annoyed.

Somehow, that doesn’t even really begin to cover it. From mild annoyance to full fledged rage, anger is a very powerful emotion. It can fuel a revolution, or push someone past the breaking point.

It’s often said that you are so angry that ‘you can’t see straight.’ There’s some truth to that.

As your anger builds your heart beats faster, providing for the thundering of your heart and the stinging, tingling sensation under your skin as blood is forced through capillaries by your accelerated heartbeat. Blood rushes to the brain, causing a distortion in perception. This also occurs around the eyes, swelling the tiny capillaries in the eyelids, causing you to ‘see red’ as the saying goes. A headache is also common when that angry, caused by the stress of the moment and the increased blood flow. Often you want to hit something, so your arm muscles will bunch, adding to the feel of tension in your limbs.

All in all, a very clinical and dry description of a powerhouse of emotion, isn’t it?

Don’t be too clinical with your descriptions, though. Rather than describing the muscles bunching and the prickling of blood vessels, describe it in a way you feel it.

Example:

Jason turned away from her apology, trying to relax fingers that had been so tightly curled they throbbed. His shoulders were tight, tension radiating across and down his back. His skin felt hot as he gulped air in a desperate attempt to calm himself.

Unfortunately, anger can all too easily lead one of the darkest of human emotions—Hate.

Hate

Encarta gives the definition for hate as:

Hate (noun) (1) a feeling of intense hostility toward somebody or something. (2) (verb) to dislike someone or something intensely, often in a way that evokes feelings of anger, hostility, or animosity.

A rather tame way to describe it, don’t you think?

Hate is possibly the most telling of all emotions. Hate can make a good man do the most evil, gruesome things and turn love sour as vinegar. Hate can blind you more than anger, more than fear. It can push you to do things you would never do in your own darkest imaginings Hate revels in it, and for a moment, you do too. In such intense emotion there is a freedom that is addictive, sweet and as deadly as poison.

Example:

Something in him snapped as he saw him there, laughing amid the Mardi Gras crowd. Laughing, mocking the pain that burned in every breath he took, in every pulse of his heart. The world narrowed everything but him and that monster fading into a red haze. He wasn’t aware of his feet pounding the cobblestone pavement or the frightened shrieks as people dove out of his way. All he could hear was the harsh rasp of his own breathing and the derisive laughter of the bastard who had stolen his whole world with a few careless words.

The bottle in his hand smashed against a post as he ran, beer foaming and glass shards flying. The sting of glass splinters cutting his face only served to make the black fury welling up from deep inside him stronger and more lethal. For a second, he saw those hateful, laughing eyes cloud with realization and then terror. The dark heart of him laughed gleefully as his arm plunged forward, burying the remains of the beer bottle in warm flesh. Up under the sternum, reveling in the feel of blood spilling hot over his hand and the fading horror in those damned mocking eyes as his life drained away.

And often, when hate goes, what remains is despair and emptiness.

Despair

Encarta gives the definition for despair as:

De*spair (noun) A profound feeling that there is no hope.

Again, a dim view through clouded glass at what the emotion really entails.

Despair is that feeling that nothing can ever be right again, that nothing that you knew would ever be the way is was before. It’s an aching void in the pit of your stomach that nothing can fill, not food nor drink. Despair is desolation worse than anything you might have ever felt before.

I’m going to continue with our pervious example, the man who just murdered another in the midst of a Mardi Gras celebration.

Example:

He felt his knees hit the cobblestones, but distantly. He was still trapped in those dying eyes and all the rage bled from him, like the blood pouring from the belly of the man in front of him. He saw his own hands covered in blood and his stomach gave a weak lurch, but he felt it only vaguely. The world seemed trapped in amber, a slow-motion reel that didn’t make sense.

He had killed a man. He had done something unforgivable, something that had shattered everything even more than those careless words that had ripped his own world away. He didn’t even struggle as he was hauled to his feet by ungentle hands, because nothing mattered anymore. Not one damned thing. He could only laugh weakly as he stared at his own bloodstained hands.

That leads us neatly into our next emotion, a brother to despair, Remorse.

Remorse

Encarta gives the definition for remorse as:

Re*morse (noun) a strong feeling of guilt and regret.

That’s not actually a bad definition, but let’s dig a little deeper.

Remorse is regret, yes, to put it in the very simplest of terms. It's that moment when you know, deep down inside, that if you had done something just the slightest bit different; things wouldn't have turned out the way they did.

It feels like a weight on your chest, crushing your ribs until they bend and creak and you can barely breathe. It's almost a physical pain, because deep down, you know that you could have changed it. Knowing that you had the power in your grasp to make thing come out differently, and you didn't use it.

Example:

He stood there for a moment, numb and shaken, thinking that if he had just stretched out a hand; just said one word, that this would not have happened. His breath came short and his eyes stung and burned with the tears he could not shed in public. The pitiful body on the pavement, like a puppet with its strings cut, blood pooling under tangled limbs, was a wordless accusation. If he had just been able to reach him, the teenager would not be lying there, broken beyond all repair. His fingers trembled as if to reach out, to bridge that gap that was now insurmountable. All it would have taken was one word, one single word in the right place and this could have been avoided.

And remorse brings us around to Guilt.

Guilt

Encarta gives the definition for guilt as:

Guilt (noun) An awareness of having done wrong or committed a crime, accompanied by feelings of shame and regret.

One of Encarta’s better definitions, actually.

Most everyone has felt guilty at one time or another, even if it’s just a lingering guilt for forgetting a date. But guilt has the potential to be a crushing weight. Like remorse, it can make it hard to even breathe because you know that what happened is something you did. You didn't react fast enough, didn't see it coming, but know that you should have.

Hindsight's twenty-twenty, but in the heat of the moment, you're blind. You always think that if you could have been just a little bit faster, a little bit smarter, you could have seen it coming. Whether it was screaming angrily at someone, just before they walked out the door and into a fatal situation or it was a simple as knowing that you are to blame for the anger that clouded their vision, guilt is the heaviest of burdens to bear.

It can weigh on you more heavily than anything else. It never goes away. They can tell you again and again, that it wasn't your fault that there was nothing you could have done. But you won't believe them, because you know that if you had just been understanding, that it wouldn't have happened, that they would have seen the other car run the red light or the truck as they stepped onto the crosswalk.

Example:

As he knelt beside the simple stone the lilies in his hand weighed more than they had any right to. He reached out with shaking fingers to trace the sculpted letters of his lover’s name, feeling the edges that time had not yet blunted. Silently, he whispered a prayer to whatever gods might be listening.

His small group of friend had told him time and again that he was killing himself over something that wasn’t his doing -- that he wasn’t to blame for what one moment of inattention had brought, but he knew better.

It was eating at him like a canker; slowly sapping away his health and strength, but he couldn’t find it in him to care. He could only hope that when he finally succumbed to the cancerous guilt wearing him away bit by bit, that his lover would forgive him.

Next up is Envy and her evil twin, Jealousy.

Envy

Encarta gives the definition for envy as:

En*vy (noun) (1) The resentful or unhappy feeling of wanting somebody else’s success, good fortune, qualities or possessions. (2) (verb) to desire something possessed by someone else.

A better description, but still, barely half the story.

All of us have probably envied someone at some point in our lives, be it a movie star or that kid in homeroom who always seemed to get straight A’s without even studying. You know what I mean.

You can study all day and still only make B’s and they make it look effortless. It lodges in the back of your throat like a hard little stone, and you want to yell out, “I’m better than you, so how can you make it look so easy?”

They have the acclaim that you want. You crave it, and need it with a passion that can border on obsession. They say envy leaves a bitter taste, and that’s not far from the truth. It’s like a bad hangover or acid reflux, bile searing the lining of your throat until you want to scream to be rid of it.

Example:

Envy burned in the back of his throat as he watched Rick glide across the floor with a grace he had once possessed, charming everyone with a smile. William looked down at his frail legs under the blanket that hid them and wished, not for the first time, that he’d never gotten into that car. His heart felt like it had climbed up into the back of his mouth and frozen there, a hard lump that made it difficult to even breathe. He felt sick when he caught himself thinking that it should have been Rick in the car that night.

Jealousy

Encarta gives the definition for jealousy as:

Jeal*ous-ee; ‘the act of being jealous’. 

~smirks~ Not very helpful there, were they, so we’ll go back to the root word jealous.

Jeal*ous (adjective) (1) envious; feeling bitter and unhappy because of another's advantages, possessions, or luck (2) suspicious of rivals; feeling suspicious about a rival's or competitor's influence, especially in regard to a loved one.

See? I told you envy and jealousy were evil twins.

Jealousy is only a short step away from envy and sometimes it’s hard to tell the two apart. Where envy is focused more on what the person has, jealousy is more about the person. You are jealous of the person, rather than what they have. Yes, you want what they have, but in here, the emotions are more focused on them.

It’s a greedy emotion, swallowing up rational thinking in a haze of ‘how can they have that (or him, or her) while I have nothing?’

Envy breeds jealousy and in its wake you are left in a morass of guilt and the horrible feeling that you have touched something unpleasant, and you will never get the stink off of you.

Example:

William watched Rick accept Marie’s hand and the two of them twirl out to the center of the dance floor, graceful as a pair of swans on the water. So, Rick had not only taken what he had, but the woman he loved also. He paled and the heart in his throat dropped down to the bottom of his stomach with a thud as he realized that he wanted nothing more than to take from Rick all he had. His skin crawled and he felt slimy. When had he become such a monster?

Dark emotions in their own right and in a way as powerful as anger and hate, but jealousy and envy are slyer. They creep in around your defenses and thrive in all the dark places of a human heart. And even when you think you have banished them, they are still lingering in the shadows of your psyche, just waiting for the chance to sink greedy claws into your heart, and breed more hatred.

Scary, isn’t it? So let’s talk Fear.

Fear

Encarta gives the definition for fear as:

Fear (noun) (1) feeling of anxiety-an unpleasant feeling of anxiety or apprehension caused by the presence or anticipation of danger (2) Frightening thought; an idea, thought, or other entity that causes feelings of fear.

There are many levels and degrees of fear though, so let’s take a look at some of them.

There’s the guilty, giddy sort of fear triggered by a horror movie or a carnival haunted house. The same kind of fear you get staying out too late, knowing you will be in trouble when you get home. It’s the sort of fear that leaves you laughing when the so-called danger has passed.

In other words, once the thrill ride is over or the credits start to roll.

At that moment, it was scary, but when it’s gone, so is the fear, leaving you breathless and exhilarated.

Example:

Tim and Corie tumbled out the doors of the haunted mansion, breathless and unable to stop laughing. They leaned against each other for support, legs trembling.

All creatures have a fight or flight response to fear. It triggers a burst of adrenaline and endorphins, the better to run away or fight for your life with. That’s what leaves you giddy and laughing in a situation like that, where the reaction has no outlet.

Real fear, such as; fear for your life, is a bit different.

When you are well and truly scared, your heart pounds and you feel almost dizzy with the fear and adrenalin pouring through your blood. That’s your body’s way of telling you, ‘This is dangerous. Get away.’ It makes your breath catch in your throat and your muscles tremble with the need to run or fight back. Your palms sweat and the small hairs on your body stand up. It’s a very visceral emotion, one of the most primitive and thus one of the most dangerous.

A frightened man can be pushed beyond the extremes of body and strength; can do what no other emotion can push him to.

Often when you are that scared, the higher, thinking portion of your brain shuts down and the world around you can only be glimpsed in a disjointed series of images; some clear as glass and others blurred out of recognition.

Example:

He could see them all around him, dark figures with no distinguishable faces, only the bright gleam of moonlight on metal. His skin crawled at the sight of so many weapons and there was a bitter coppery taste flooding his mouth. The leader grinned, a flash of bone-white against a dark shadow and suddenly they were on him. Terror spiked through him like the first sting of steel tearing through the flesh of his arm.

The fight degenerated into a disorganized jumble of images, only one, or two standing out with stark clarity. His blood roared in his ears, only pierced when someone screamed, the thin, high shriek of a dying rabbit. Suddenly, he saw an opening and snatching at his friend’s wrist, he bulled for it, blind to the bright agony of the weapons lashing out and biting into his flesh.

There’s another sort of fear too, the fear of being alone.

Loneliness

Encarta gives the definition for loneliness as:

Lone*li*ness (noun) as without companionship or support from other people, feeling sad and isolated.

It's being isolated from things emotionally, too.

You've heard the phrase "alone in a crowded room"? It’s a mix of frustration, need, and anger with a liberal helping of sadness thrown in for good measure. You don’t want to be alone, you don’t want to be detached from everyone else, but you are.

It's easy to be alone in a crowded room when you are disconnected from the crowd swirling and crashing around you, like waves around a pillar of stone.

Example:

Leon felt like he was trapped in a glass case; able to see and hear, but not able to touch. He stood at the edges of the crowd, adrift on a wash of voices babbling in so many languages that it made no more sense than the shush of waves. The few things he could understand only served to make him feel more isolated. He wanted to be part of the conversations eddying out there, but he was as out of place as a fish on dry land.

In Conclusion:

All of these emotions are the darker side, but they give you a good handle on how to use emotions in fiction. Don’t just describe the character as angry. Use the feelings and bodily reactions to draw the reader in; to make them so caught up in the way the character feels that they are hopelessly entranced in the story.

An emotion is a physical presence in a good story, as much a character as the main character and as necessary as a good plot.

Kita the Spaz
 -- Written by request from Morgan Hawke
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Should I get a Degree in Writing?

 "Should I get a Degree in Writing?"

----- Original Message -----
I've being toying with the idea of getting a degree in 'Creative Writing' recently and was wondering if this is a good idea or not?
 -- Wanna go Pro

WARNING! RANT Ahead...!

If you want to write professionally, Don't Waste your Money on 

Creative Writing courses. 

What they teach you in those so-called Creative Writing classes is how to break rules, not how to USE them to write a story a publisher will accept. In addition, they may RUIN the instincts for storytelling you currently possess and destroy your ability to write publishable fiction.

Instead, take a few cheap writing courses on COPYWRITING because that is how published fiction (and non-fiction) is actually written.

If you don't plan on writing Professionally then knock your socks off and take as many Creative Writing courses as your bank account can handle. I hear they're a lot of fun. Just don't expect any publisher to ever accept your...results.

As an author of over 30 published titles, I can tell you from years of experience that:

1) You DON'T need a degree of any kind to write Fiction successfully.


What you need are Life Experiences to write from.

You can't describe what you don't Know, so pack your back-pack and Go places, See things, and Do things. Join a Living History group or three. Learn how to; shoot a black-powder musket, ride a horse, belly-dance, wield a sword while wearing armor, spin wool, weave cloth, play a musical instrument, train dogs, speak a foreign language...etc. (I've done all of these.)

2) ANY fiction-writing course that isn't taught by a multi-published Fiction Author is a waste of your time and money.


You need to learn from those who actually DO IT, not from those who wish they could.

3) Realize and Accept that there is absolutely Nothing CREATIVE about writing for Money.


The Writing Guidelines posted by publishing houses are NOT Guidelines, they're absolute and unbreakable Rules. If you don't write what they want in the way they want it you WILL be Rejected --no matter how brilliant it is-- simply because it's Not what they asked for in their Guidelines.

"Is Writing Fiction

a good Profession?"

Not really. The pay sucks ass, especially if you are writing for a New York publisher. If you work for an ePublishing house the pay is better and far more frequent, but it's still not impressive.

For the Dirty Details: $Money Facts$: Ebooks & NY Print Publication

Just so you know, the ONLY ebook genre that actually makes good money these days is Erotic Romance (Women's Adult Pulp Fiction.)

"What sort of job opportunities

are there?"

Lots of people (read: Businesses,) are looking for good writers, but none of them are willing to pay a writer what they're actually worth because they all think Writing is EASY. (We all learned it in grammar school so it must be easy, right?)

For the Dirty Details: How Much Does a Copywriter Actually Make?

"If you have a degree in English and/or something writing orientated,

is it worth it?"

It's NOT, especially if you plan to write Fiction.

A degree in English will only teach you how to TEACH English -- not use it, and critique books in ways even the authors don't get. Unless you intend to make a living writing essays, teaching school, or as an editor correcting other people's fiction manuscripts, an English degree is a waste of your time and money.

"What are your thoughts on going to University to learn to Write professionally?"

If you want a degree Get One.

However...! Most universities prepare you for Teaching, Research, and Business -- NOT fiction writing. Be prepared to spend a lot of money learning a ton of crap you will not only never use, but may possibly Damage the fiction-writing skills you've already developed. 

If you're bound and determined to take classes on writing, go to Fiction Writing Workshops. Those are usually hosted by published authors and you'll actually learn things that are useful to your writing like; plotting, character design, pacing, narrative tricks, and the grammar authors use.

For the Dirty Details: The Secret to Proper Paragraphing for Fiction. 

If you want to write professionally then simply WRITE and post where your work can be found. Hang out where the authors hang out and Pay Attention when they give advice. Read as many books on writing as you can get your hands on; but only those written by Published AUTHORS. Most importantly, Keep Writing until a publisher spots your work and offers you a contract.

That's what worked for me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~